Category Archives: Asia

A Feisty Farewell

No trip to Central Asia is complete without some yurt action, so naturally we had to check it out and see what it’s like to spend a night in a yurt. If you’ve read any of our other posts on Central Asia, you will probably not be surprised to know that getting to said yurt involved a pretty rough, long drive. The landscape was all desert, not so much sand dunes, but lots of patches of about 6-inch high plants and nothing else. We stopped in this one area that seemed to pop up out of nowhere, with just a few trees and tons of locals picnicking, which was completely random and really fascinating.

While here, we climbed up the slate rocks to check out some very old petroglyphs. Up top, a local guy showed us a scorpion he caught and somehow maneuvered into a water bottle. It’s probably for the best that we declined to share this piece of information with Linda until after the yurt stay was over.

When we finally arrived, we were smack in the middle of the hot hot desert. There wasn’t much around except for a handful of yurts and a few camels, though our yurt accommodation was surprisingly fancy – we got thick mats to sleep on, there was even a light and a power outlet in the room, and get this…flushing toilets on the premises! Living large, my friends.

Alan and Ron went off to explore Lake Aidarkul for a quick and refreshing swim. Meanwhile, Linda and I stuck around at the yurts for a camel ride. Our camel guy seemed to be mildly infatuated with me, and I was hesitant to include this on here because it makes me all bashful, but I got a kick out of the fact that in Alan’s notes from this day it reads “J and Linda do camel ride, guess guy loves J. Natch.” Aw, honey.

Dinner was a multi course meal amongst the other tourists in a bigger tent. We drank a little vodka, busted out the cards and played a little dhumbal, and then everyone headed outside to the campfire where a Kazakh (the yurt camp was near Kazakhstan and thus many local residents are ethnic Kazakhs) singer and guitar player serenaded us. The Americans headed to bed afterwards, but the Russian tourists stayed up late very passionately (read: loudly) singing some patriotic songs.

As a telling example of the monitoring and control the government does and has, know that tourists must “register” at every hotel they stay at. These little stubs we receive when we hand over our passports at each stop must be presented upon exiting the country as proof of where we’ve been. So, even at this yurt in the middle of the desert, we had to use our passports to get documentation to serve as proof of our whereabouts. I’m starting to get the feeling that the government likes knowing where we are!

On the drive out to the yurt we had stopped in Gijduvan for a demonstration of the pottery workshop. You know this guy is legit, because he met Hillary.

We also stopped briefly to see a fortress built by Alexander the Great (holy oldness!) and to see the holy water spring and holy fish (so much holy in this sentence!) at the base of the fortress. While Ron and Alan climbed up top for the view, Linda and I stayed down and chatted with Mansur. A very curious Uzbek tourist was intrigued, and, speaking no English (or anything for that matter), stood about three inches from my face and watched me as I spoke and listened. I tried to be polite but my personal space bubble was just bursting and I finally had to run away from her in the awkward, shamed way that us space-bubble activists do. By now we were quite used to being among very few tourists (meaning foreigners, as we saw tons of Uzbek tourists) and used to people saying hello, wanting to know where we’re from, etc. We joked with our guide that we should just wear a big sign that says “AMERICA,” since he was constantly fielding the same question from curious Uzbeks as to our origins. Luckily, all the Uzbeks we encountered responded with enthusiasm, or – at the very least – tolerance (sadly, this was not the case for all of our Central Asian visit).

We left the yurt early in a best efforts attempt to escape the desert heat before it was at its most oppressive. It was Samarkand or bust! By now, by the way, the views on our drives were becoming more and more incredible. Beautiful pastures backed by stunning snow-capped mountains. Every so often a boy riding a donkey, or a shepherd tending his herd of cattle. Or sheep. And then these fields of poppies. I can’t even stand how beautiful it was. These photos are not even properly taken. They’re car shots. From a moving van. You can see the reflection of the camera in the window. And the blur from the speed. And it’s still the most amazing pastoral scene.

And then, the pent-up excitement was killing us. We’d been teased by these mosques, these madrasas, these caravanserais, these architecturally and historically significant buildings. One after another of impressive, amazing, intricate, beautifully tiled, older-than-old things. But we knew the icing on the cake would be Samarkand. Oh, Samarkand, the holy grail of Silk Road destinations. And here it was, at our fingertips and ready for our incessant photo taking and endless stories of ancient Islamic tall tales. And this is what we arrived to:

Wouldn’t it be our luck that our trip to Central Asia coincided with a period of construction and renovation on perhaps the most noteworthy historical sight among all of the Silk Road’s sights. I can’t lie, after all the history we’d soaked up like a (partially functioning) sponge, we were not quite in the right state of mind to truly appreciate the awesomeness that is Samarkand’s Registan Square, but this construction really did us in. We could hardly appreciate the grandeur of these buildings. Their scale puts the ones we saw in Tashkent, Khiva and Bukhara to shame, but it is very difficult to appreciate from the side, with jackhammers screaming (as evidenced by my face in that lovely video). I think part of what detracted from our experience here as well was that there were so many souvenir shops in, and modernization evident on, the buildings – for example, plastered walls and lights installed in the rooms to create better gift shops. Restoration is one thing, but some of this felt more like alteration and enhancement. We did not realize that all three enormous buildings on Registan Square were built after Tamerlane’s rule. By the way, Tamerlane is the same guy as Amir Temur.

Our first afternoon in town we were on our own, so we wandered around a bit independently. We meandered down the walking street, which used to be lined with stalls and covered. There is a bit more of a regular city vibe here (short shorts sighting included – though jeans are still a rarity). It’s not too surprising given that it’s the second most populous city in Uzbekistan at about a half million people. While the walking street is lined with souvenir shops and feels quite sanitized, it is a very pleasant place to kill an afternoon.

We ventured into the Jewish quarter in a search for the synagogue. By chance, McLovin happened to find us and show us the way. Not kidding. This kid had the lisp and everything…is this not the Uzbek twin of McLovin?!

We escaped the heat with a soft-serve in the shade. When in Samarkand do as the Uzbeks do?

There is also a nice little market off the walking street.

Aside from Registan Square, we also visited the first mausoleum of Amir Temur, where he is buried among others. It’s decorated with marble, papier-mâché over brick, gold leaf adorning everywhere, and the tomb is black jade.

What still managed to impress us mightily after all the sightseeing we’d done by this point was Shah-i-Zinda, a narrow street lined with mausoleums so densely packed and intricate it’s hard to fully absorb what’s surrounding you. This was by far the most impressive tile work we saw on the trip.

The tile-making process is incredibly intricate. Check out these pictures that give you a little sense of how much work goes into each one.

Our next stop in Central Asia was Kyrgyzstan, and getting there was quite the ordeal. After a change in schedule made the Tashkent to Bishkek flight less appealing, we decided to drive from Tashkent and cross the border at Osh, Krygyzstan, followed by a domestic flight from Osh to Bishkek. This was probably a mistake. We will cover the Osh airport incident in a separate post, but even getting to that scene was not an easy process.

The drive was much longer than our travel agents (both local and foreign) said it would be (how neither organization, whose functions entail solely guiding tourists through these countries, could figure this out is beyond me), and thus we spent 6.5 hours in the car without time even to stop for toilets or water. There was some beautiful scenery, and, this is still Uzbekistan, so there were also some checkpoints. I mean, why would anyone think you can move around freely within a country? One checkpoint involved getting out of the car and waiting while watching our passports get tossed onto the hood of someone else’s (moving) car. But anyway, after 6.5 hours we arrive at the border for our final Uzbek exit, already frazzled about the timing mistakes (plural. Aside from driving time, neither travel agent realized there was a time change at the border, despite our efforts to confirm this given the time change in Bishkek) and potentially missing our flight and being stuck in a Kyrgyz city that some State Department equivalents recommend avoiding. The border officials know we are in a rush, and this appears to inspire them to be extra slow and spend extra time talking and joking about us while we stand there. And there is certainly no right to privacy here, or at least the border control folks have no concern violating it. This is evident as the bag searches begin. The situation came to a head when one guy made me take out my laptop, open my photos (I guess because you are not supposed to take photos of certain things and places, the authorities feel entitled to search your photo files upon exit) and then started going through not only the photos from our time in Uzbekistan, but proceeded to peruse my older photos, including a photo album I’d made for Alan after our first year of dating. At which point I, in the middle of this border control building and surrounded by about six employees doing nothing but helping themselves to a tour of my photos and belongings, barely able to contain the rage bubbling up inside of me, slapped his hand away and grabbed my computer back saying something along the lines of “enough, this is ridiculous…[mumble lots of swears].” Though he certainly wasn’t able to decipher what I was rapid-fire shaming him with, I told him in no uncertain terms that he had absolutely no right to be going through those photos. As Alan points out, it was a bit of a ballsy and risky move, but it was a highly effective one, because a few minutes later we were walking across to Kyrgyzstan. And this guy clearly knew he was doing something wrong, as that was the end of all the bag checks. Alan’s was cursory at most. Hopefully I succeeded in shaming him to some extent, though this was not the end of the authorities prodding out of some perverted curiosity with further questions. Can I just say that it’s never given me greater pleasure to look a man in the eye and say, “I’m a lawyer.” This series of events filled me with a lot of rage. In retrospect, what was I to have done? Not opened the computer? Told him I had no photos? To be at a border crossing, confronted by these men is to be in a place of no power. They hold all the cards. Power does strange things to people, doesn’t it?

To summarize our time in Uzbekistan, we spent cumulatively about 10 days there. I think we all agree that we may have bitten off slightly more than we could chew in the history and sight-seeing departments, even with cutting out a number of the other Silk Road cities. We generally prefer more culture or interaction or activity on our trips (and definitely less time spent driving). But overall, we found the experience in Uzbekistan to be fascinating and worth the headaches (e.g. even despite the immigration and customs headaches). Aside from the gems hired to work its borders, the people we met in Uzbekistan were wonderfully pleasant and friendly. And it’s a tough balance to figure out because, while the security presence and red tape bullshit in Uzbekistan got very tiring, very fast, we really did feel safe here. Contrast this with Kyrgyzstan where we didn’t need a visa (in fact we did not even fill out an immigration form), didn’t have to register at our hotels, weren’t subjected to arduous border crossing processes, and didn’t get pulled over at numerous checkpoints. That was lovely, but Kyrgyzstan has a higher crime rate, and we actually felt the least safe in Krygyzstan of any country we visited (again, more on that later). Uzbekistan was unusual in many ways, and very much a different experience from most of our prior Asian travels (and really all of our travels, ever). From small, interesting nuances like the fact that drivers already in the rotary do not have the right of way, to the Soviet style checkpoints, form checking and border control, it was a place unlike any other we’ve been. There is so much of interest to see here, we feel it would benefit the country much to fix some of the issues that inhibit tourism here (e.g. making visas easier to obtain and fixing the currency issues we detailed in prior posts).

Practical Info

Transportation: We took a high-speed train back to Tashkent. There is a cafe and a couple stalls selling snacks at the station. We boarded at 4:20 pm (our guide said you should board early, he may have been just trying to go home) and the train departed (exactly on time) at 5 pm. It was incredibly nice with spacious seats that reclined. I guess we were in business class, not sure if they sell lower classed seats or what those would be like. They served complimentary tea and these tasty little burrito-like things, plus a wide selection for purchase. We arrived in Tashkent a little after 7 pm.

Accommodation: In Samarkand, we stayed at Hotel Malika Classic (not to be confused with Malika Prime). WiFi worked reasonably well, and it we paid 3k UZS for access for the whole family on unlimited devices. The hotel was quite nice and the staff was friendly and helpful, but it seemed a little removed from the action. That said, I’m not sure where the action is.

Food: My dad and I had dinner at Venezia where we got pizza, which was fine and a welcome change. With two beers and water and tip it cost 35k UZS. Lunches were at Sayor Cafe (right next to Karambek which gets good reviews, and I think the same owner), which was good, and at the Choyxona (aka tea house) by the bazaar near Bibi-Khanym Mosque, where we had manti and bread and yogurt and cucumber and tomato with dill and soup.

Activities: We covered most of this above, but I’ll add some more detail and/or repeat here. Our travel agent arranged the trip to Lake Aidarkul and the yurt stay, but we saw tourist offices advertising a similar overnight trip from Samarkand and likely other places. While I enjoyed the scenery and overall experience, it is pretty out of the way and thus if you have limited time then I would say this is skippable.

In Samarkand, while exploring on our own the first day, we walked through some back alleys and saw the Mubarak Mosque and nearby synagogue. On our full day tour, we visited the Amir Temur Mausoleum; Registan Square; Bibi-Khanym Mosque; Siab Bazaar; Shah-i-Zinda; and Ulugbek’s Observatory.

May 4-7, 2014 (Sunday-Wednesday)

Bukhara: The Living City

After another long Central Asian drive and even longer Central Asian border crossing we were back in Uzbekistan, this time bound for Bukhara. We freshened up quickly at our hotel (necessary after the mile-long walk through no man’s land in the desert heat between Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan) before heading out for a night of Uzbek food, fashion, dancing and music. This dinner, at the madrasa Nodir Devon Begi at Lyabi Khauz complex, was a lovely welcome back, and we thoroughly enjoyed our dinner (including a surprisingly not horrible Uzbek wine) while being entertained by a show alternating between fashion and traditional dance. (Very dorky) fun fact: the “madrasa” was built to be a caravanserai, but the king misidentified it as a madrasa at its unveiling, and the poor guy who built it couldn’t correct the king of course. So this is why it’s an atypical structure for a madrasa, and why you can walk straight into the courtyard (unlike other madrasas where you must go right or left upon entrance). Maybe it was that Uzbek wine, but I got inspired to shop. I’m kind of digging the Uzbek style. So much so, in fact, that I caved and bought my first “real” souvenir of the trip: a lovely Uzbek jacket.

Walking back through the old city after dinner it was immediately apparent that Bukhara is not the museum relic that Khiva is, but a living city. People are out and about everywhere, dining, drinking, shopping, laughing. It’s far more vibrant. Also more western and touristy, but overall a nice mix of activity. And we aren’t complaining about access to some of those “touristy” things we’d been missing, like ice (Alan loves his iced coffee). So enamored were we that we returned the following night to Lyabi Khauz, a plaza built around a pool shaded by some seriously old mulberry trees, for dinner at a nice restaurant on the water.

Bukhara is one of the seven holy cities of Islam because the religion developed so much here. Real religion or history buffs can have an absolute field day here, visiting as many of the 997 historic monuments as they can fit in. It’s all the more impressive when you realize that many of the buildings in Bukhara were destroyed when the Mongols invaded in 1220, and again when the (Russian) Red Army attacked and bombed the city in 1920. We had neither the time nor the attention span to see all of these, but we did get a good sampling, starting at the first building in Central Asia built of fired brick (the Ismail Samani Mausoleum) and which served as the prototype for India’s famed Taj Mahal.

The Bolo Khauz mosque, built in 1713, with an ayvan built in 1917, was particularly stunning, and we sat there on a Friday morning observing a group of old men waiting for the Friday services.

Alan and Ron got in touch with their roots for a change when we stumbled upon an old synagogue, which is home to the handful of remaining Bukhari Jews. (If you are interested in learning more, check out this New York Times article on the community in Queens.)

The gigantic fortress was impressive. It was here, of all places and all things, that bowling began when guards used to roll giant rock balls down the entrance to defend it! But what we enjoyed most was the impromptu flash mob of Uzbek ladies. (Funny enough, these are the same ladies from Fergana valley who we laughed with as the two groups of us stood around photographing each other).

Check out the video:

We executed our first black market money exchange here in Bukhara and you really feel like you’re doing something illicit when a guy your guide knows through a guy shows up with a black bag full of bills, crouches down all shady to count it out and then makes the exchange. I half expected to find a couple packets of smack in that bag. Just to be clear, this was the first black market exchange that we personally conducted. Earlier that same day, the driver who gathered us from the border crossing pulled over by what appeared to be a broken down car. Perhaps he was just a good Samaritan who received a five-gallon jug of petrol as a thank you, but the bag of cash suggested otherwise.

Perhaps the most impressive view is in the square surrounded by the Kalon Minaret, the huge Kalon Mosque and the prestigious Mir-i-Arab Madrassa. The minaret was likely the tallest building in Central Asia when it was built in the 12th Century. Genghis Khan was so impressed that he declined to destroy the minaret even as he razed everything else. By the way, I never knew that many spell Genghis as Chinggis or Jenghiz and pronounce it differently than we were taught.

This mosque (the oldest one, now home to a carpet museum) isn’t too shabby either.

Just outside the old city are even more historical sights. We checked out Chor Minor, which is a unique madrasa with four minarets. As Mansur drilled into our brains, building a madrasa kills two rabbits with one bullet 😉 : it satisfies the builder’s obligation to give charitably, while at the same time bringing him fame. This guy killed three rabbits, because the four minarets were a symbol to the world that his four daughters were, ahem, single.

Check out these doors with the double knockers – they each create a different sound so the people inside knew if a man or a woman was knocking and whether the woman answering the knock could show her face when she opened the door. Neat, eh?

Next stop was at a Sufi mausoleum. I learned that Sufism has something to do with silent meditation…something about all dervishes are Sufi but not all Sufi are dervishes…but mostly I kind of tuned out this stuff and thought about how we call my cat, Safari, Sufi for short. I know. Probably not the ideal candidate for this much historical immersion. I apologize to all our readers who were waiting patiently for my notes on Sufism.

Last stop on the tour was a visit to the Emir’s Summer Palace (the last emir, Alim Khan), an extremely pretty and intricately designed home with a lot of Russian influence. Our guide often asked us questions to keep us guessing and engaged in the course of our tours. At the summer palace he asked us to guess how the builders knew that this area would be cooler than the old city (hence the putting of the summer palace here). Our three or four guesses were dismissed before he finally gave us the answer. Linda smartly pointed out how hilarious it was that he let us keep guessing on this one like we might actually get there. The right answer? They cut a slaughtered sheep into four pieces and hung each on the four corners of the old city, waiting to see which direction spoiled the slowest, and then assumed that such direction was the coolest.

We learned a little bit, too, about Suzani embroidery. Apparently they are kind of like resumes of the girl making them, and she chooses figures that symbolize aspects of her personality. For example, the turtle symbolizes patience, the pomegranate means fertility, and the scorpion: tough. We opined on what we might sew on our own Suzanis to court each other, and we agreed neither of us would be needling any turtles. Dogs? Yes, definitely some of those. Loyal, cuddly, and super happy to see you at the end of every day. Sorry, total corn balls.

Mansur took us to his favorite spot for lamb, Chor Bakir, which was just outside of the city and certainly not touristy. The baked lamb was solid, if not incredible. But the special bread took the spotlight. It was like a super thick, flaky, buttery pie crust. Delicious.

For a little relaxation we decided to visit the Hammam. Now, being half Turkish and having visited Turkey several times you might think that I’d experienced a Turkish bath before, but no. I’d somehow avoided this experience until Uzbekistan. And it will most certainly be my last time. I’d say that it was one of the least comfortable experiences I’ve ever had. Not so much the vigorous scrubbing or the weird body contortions or the intense heat that was amplified by the ginger they rub on you, but the fact that it was a young man and I was, well, naked. Why couldn’t I get a fat old lady with a really big mole on her face? No, who am I kidding, I’d still be incredibly uncomfortable in that situation. The baths are not for me.

On the way out of town we happened upon a bird market and popped out of the van to explore. I’ve never seen so many birds in one place! My friend Jaimie has pretty severe ornithophobia, and I kept thinking this would be her nightmare.

Over on the prepared foods side of the market we picked up fixings for another picnic lunch. We ate so many dried fruits and nuts on this trip! I was able to fuel the fire that is my obsession with yellow raisins, and we even discovered a tasty new treat: apricot kernels.

Practical Info

You can walk to visit all the attractions in and around the old city, but you will need motorized transport to visit the Emir’s Summer Palace and/or the Bakhautdin Naqshband Mausoleum. If you like shopping, there are little domed bazaars at the crossroads of various streets and pedestrian paths. Today these seem pretty touristy, but markets have existed in this fashion for centuries. We saw many vendors with beautiful pottery near the Kalon Minaret and elsewhere.

Accommodation: We stayed at Karavan Hotel. The location seems pretty good, as it is right in between the different “old town” sites. There is free WiFi in the lobby, and they did our laundry for a reasonable price. That said, since Bukhara was the most lively and fun city we visited, I might prefer to stay closer to Lyabi Khauz. Which would put you further away from Bolo Khauz and the Mausoleum of Ismail Samani etc., but more in the middle of a fun little evening scene. A couple spots I noticed there were Hotel ASL and Hotel Asia.

Food: Our first night we went to the 6 pm dinner, folklore, music and fashion show at Madrasa Nodir Devon Begi (at Lyabi Khauz complex). It cost 230k UZS including a bottle of wine, i.e. not cheap but it was enjoyable and worth it. Another night we ate near the same place, right on the little water square at Lyabi Khauz. It was quite good and lively.

For lunches, we enjoyed Bolo Khauz Cafe (near the eponymous mosque), which had a nice mix of locals and some tourists. After our day trip to the Sufi shrine and Summer Palace, we had lunch at Chor Bakir, a non-touristy lamb spot outside the city. The baked lamb was solid if not incredible. The “special” bread we waited for out of the oven was incredible.

I finally got my iced coffee fix at Minor Coffee House. Well, actually it was a strange mix of espresso and Pepsi, but it had ice so I didn’t complain. Cafe Wishbone had a delicious iced coffee that was more like a frappuccino.

On our way out of town we stopped at the large market for picnic supplies. The variety and quantity of nuts and dried fruits are impressive (with combos like walnut-stuffed apricots). We bought outstanding apricot kernels…our guide said that Bukhara apricots are special which is why these kernels are better than most. They also sell chicken legs, apparently purchased from the US for their unnatural immensity. These are called Bush legs, no joke.

Activities: We covered most of this above, but I’ll list it out here. On our full day city tour we visited the Ismail Samani Mausoleum; the Chashma-Ayub Mausoleum; Bolo Khauz Mosque; the Ark Fortress (similar to Kunya Ark in Khiva, this was the royal town within a town), within which is the reception and coronation court, another mosque and some small museums; Kalon Minaret and Mosque; Mir-i-Arab Madrassa; an old Jewish synagogue near Lyabi Khauz; and the oldest mosque (I forget the name) which is now a carpet museum.

The hammam that Jenni so enjoyed is called Bozori Kord. I did not experience quite the discomfort that she did, but I would drop it in the category of an experience rather than a supremely enjoyable experience. My dad and I suffered in the uber hot room for about 15 minutes too long before being doused and roughly massaged with our faces pressed against a marble slab. All while I’m fearing that the man contorting me isn’t quite as focused on my herniated discs as I am. And that ginger scrub combined with lying down on hot stones honestly made me feel like my back was on fire. It was astoundingly hot, relieved only somewhat after they threw buckets of cold water on us. The fee for this hour of bliss is a mere 60k UZS.

On our day trip outside the city, we visited the Bakhautdin Naqshband Mausoleum (the memorial complex of the Sufi saint Naqshbandi) and the Emir’s Summer Palace.

May 1-4, 2014 (Thursday-Sunday)

And It Burns, Burns, Burns

You start to feel like you’re out there when your guide uses Afghanistan as a directional point of reference. “Afghanistan is just that a-way.” “See those mountains over there? That’s Iran.” But then you really feel out there when you drive hours into the Turkmen desert in search of a giant gas crater that has been burning non-stop for more than forty years, and then camp right by it. But I’ll get to that shortly. Any doubt that we were off the usual tourist circuit was obliterated when we realized that the entire time we were in the country we saw only one other person we were certain was a foreign tourist! (And she was a deaf-mute Japanese girl… is your mind blown yet? Again, I’ll get to that in a minute). Lest doubt linger on, know this: the former president of Turkmenistan proposed renaming the months of the year. After things like his mother.

Our entry to Turkmenistan was an “out there” experience in its own right. It was our first overland border crossing in Central Asia, from Uzbekistan. The process of getting from the edge of Uzbekistan (coming from Khiva) to the start of Turkmenistan (at Dashoguz) was an ordeal that took the better part of two hours, and included no less than nine (yes we counted them) passport checks. Mind you there were no lines. The process is just. that. slow.

Let’s break it down, shall we? First, there is a briefing by the guide who drives you to the border that you are under no circumstances to take pictures at the border. (We sneakily took our one photo from the car, but then, unfortunately, we had to halt the documentation of this epic process). After our car dropped us a solider checked our passports before we were able to enter the building. We filled out some forms and passed through customs. Of course, a few more people are checking our passports through this process. Occasionally, they are checking our bags. For what, I don’t exactly know. Then we walk a little bit further to immigration where our passports are stamped. Then, a solider on the other side checks our passports once more. Then you walk across to the Turkmen soil where another couple of soldiers checked our passports and looked for our visas (we only had an invitation letter at this point). Here, we were told to wait, and eventually up came a minivan to shuttle us the maybe half mile or so across no-man’s land to begin the process of entering Turkmenistan. Never mind that we had no choice in the matter of whether to walk, we were charged $1 each for the convenience. Again we wait for a soldier to check our passports and invitation letter while he sits in a little glass cube for several minutes hand writing down information from our documents. Our hearts sank a little when we thought he said “bad news,” but he was really saying something in Turkmen that we can only assume means “wait here while I very slowly cut through some red tape.” Finally, our passports retrieved, we walk to the main building and hand our passports over to the next lemming. Thankfully, our guide met us here, and explained that we should have a seat because it could be a half hour or more before we got anywhere. He also assisted in the customs procedure by asking about three different ways whether we were transporting any drugs or souvenirs as they checked our bags (apparently there are very strict rules governing the export of certain items, and if we had bought things like these items in Uzbekistan and failed to document that then we might face trouble when we tried to leave Turkmenistan. For this same reason, we were advised to buy items like jewelry or carpets only at official stores that can provide official papers).

Talk about a nation (or nations) in their post-communist era independent infancy. There’s a whole lot of bureaucracy and red tape and rules that don’t make a whole lot of sense in these parts. At least to an outsider. And we tried, oh we tried, to understand. We asked ourselves why five people need to look at your passport in the course of 100 yards. Is it because the state is large and needs to find employment for its citizens? Is it because the powers that be do not trust the workers and soldiers to check things correctly? And if so, is this a manifestation of a general lack of trust? Is it because they want to create an atmosphere of authority and ensure you get the message that the state is powerful and knows everything you are doing? All of the above?

As mind boggling as this experience was, quite possibly the most amazing part of it was the one other person we saw crossing: a deaf-mute young woman from Japan. Talk about balls! I can’t even imagine traveling alone in this part of the world, let alone as a woman (not that it can’t be done, and we’ve met women who travel the world independently, I’m just saying they are infinitely braver than I), but a deaf-mute single woman for whom English is her second language?! We observed one of the soldiers trying to communicate with her and she wrote down (in perfect English and very neat handwriting) “can you write, please?” The man clearly couldn’t read English, and I wouldn’t be surprised if very few people in this part of the world can read and write English well enough to communicate effectively. So, kudos to this massively impressive girl. We keep meaning to Google her and see if maybe she’s writing a book or something. Our other theory is that she is a spy and the whole deaf-mute thing is a cover. In this case, she is probably also a ninja.

Having finally succeeded in crossing the border (which in its own right felt like an accomplishment of sorts), we were greeted by our animated guide Rustam, and two SUV’s packed and ready for camping. Our driver, Aman, was the coolest grandpa I’ve ever met. He rocked Ray-Bans and had a look you might expect of a guy driving you across the Sahara from North Africa. Already we began to notice differences from Uzbekistan. First, while the landscape hadn’t much changed, it already looked and felt more wealthy. I suppose this is not terribly surprising given Turkmenistan’s comparative wealth (they have a robust gas supply, in addition to a healthy textile industry and agricultural crops. In fact, the state provides 120L of petrol free per month, and thereafter it costs about $0.25 per liter! Our guide said you could run the utilities in your home non-stop for a year and pay something like $50.) We passed some fairly basic looking villages but then began driving through a small city lined with big, modern buildings, and we started seeing the roads dotted with Beemers and Lexuses.

It perhaps goes without saying that when you have a guided tour in a country your experience is somewhat colored by the opinions and personality of that guide. Our guide in Turkmenistan was young, spirited and lively, and we felt that extended somewhat to the country as well. Despite that Turkmenistan bans Facebook and Uzbekistan does not, we felt a noticeable increase in cheeriness (albeit alongside an increase in aggressiveness). First of all, crossing the border we immediately began to see more variation in the color of the cars, in stark contrast with Uzbekistan’s white vehicles (our guide had told us this is because of the oppressive summer heat). Like Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan is primarily Muslim, but it is not an Islamic state, and again our guide felt inclined to point out that they are not fundamentalist Muslims (his words: they pray outside the mosque, like beer and pork and do not kill people). A rather blunt statement, but I guess they are sensitive to the fact that many ignorant people have a difficult time grasping the concept that there are Muslim-majority nations that are neither Islamic states nor infected by fundamentalism. The guides believe that many Americans fear this region and/or that we are told not to come here, which is at least partly true. But to make a long story short, we had only one very unpleasant and uncomfortable experience while in Central Asia (which we’ll mention when we cover Kyrgyzstan), and it did have to do with our being American but had nothing to do with religion.

On the way to the desert we stopped briefly to visit a produce market and picked up some local cognac and wine. Our guide raved about the cheap and delicious Turkmen cognac (20 Manat for a decent sized bottle), but I think we were mostly excited to pay for something without counting through a thick wad of cash (unlike Uzbekistan, here the exchange rate is closer to 3:1 and large bills are in circulation). We tried desperately to photograph some of these women with the epic teeth bling, but to no avail. They smile and flash these golden chompers, but the minute you hold the camera up the smiles turn tight lipped. We also tried to snap a shot of the adorable school girls in their green uniforms and long pigtail braids (which we learned were a required part of the uniform. If you haven’t got the hair you must get the extensions). The boys, somewhat less cute, wore little suits and taqiyahs (traditional Turkmen caps). This is the best shot we got:

Our final stop pre-crater awesomeness was our brief intro to Turkmenistan’s ancient Silk Road history (having gotten more than our fair share of old buildings and history in Uzbekistan we opted to skip most of the more prominent Silk Road attractions in Turkmenistan). Nonetheless we made the not-so-quick excursion to Konye-Urgench for a very quick tour. These sites were not as restored or excavated as the ones we viewed in Uzbekistan, but they were very much in the middle of nowhere, so you got to feel somewhat the experience of what it might have been like to pull up at one of these desert oases in your caravan (way) back in the day. We snapped the obligatory mausoleum photos and got accosted by a group of locals eager to photograph us. I was intrigued to learn that there is a hill (called Kyrk Molla) women roll down in the hopes it will make them more fertile (lots of Turkmen folks come here on pilgrimage). I just hope none of them are doing this while already pregnant.

And alas, onto the crater, which is essentially the reason we made this entire foray into the fascinating nation of Turkmenistan. After leaving Konye-Urgench and passing back through Dashoguz, we still had another four hours or so driving through the middle of nowhere. Literally. There was nothing for miles in any direction for large chunks of this drive. I would be lying if I told you the thought never crossed my mind that these guys could be taking us to some secret cult headquarters. The roads were in quite the state of disrepair, and this resulted in some serious swerving. It didn’t help that keeping right was more of a suggestion than a rule, and cars would occasionally just begin driving on the wrong side of the “highway” because there were fewer potholes. We were also intrigued by the sporadic arrangements of straw boxes placed roadside; these apparently help keep the sand from blowing across and clogging the roads.

The day turned into night and eventually we reached a turnoff, leaving the “highway” for what was essentially off-roading (which didn’t feel that different from highway driving), in the dark of night, in the middle of the Karakum Desert. All alone. Aside from our two vehicles, there was no source of light. Until, that is, we began to see this gigantic red glow ahead in the darkness. And then suddenly, there it was. A gigantic (70 meters across) hole in the middle of the desert, burning.

Both the crater and the fire were caused by man, which cheapens it in a way. I thought it was all natural. But nonetheless one of the most surreal things I’ve experienced. While the exact history of this phenomenon is uncertain, Wikipedia says the Soviets were drilling for natural gas here in 1971 and the ground collapsed beneath the drilling rig. To avoid poisonous gas discharge, geologists decided to light it on fire and thought it would burn a few days. It’s been burning ever since: more than 40 years! The whole thing is not one giant flame, however, but various areas (I assume pockets of gas) are alight while others just look like rock. For this reason, some spots are 200º Celsius while others are only 30º.

We stared in awe at this oversized campfire (I remarked at the time that I felt like I was in Honey I Shrunk The Kids: The Camping Edition). We were the only people there except for bumping into the deaf-mute girl and her guide. That guide saw us ogling the crater and noted there are three things capable of making people stand and stare: waterfalls, fire, and other people working.

I know it seems strange that we’re wearing winter jackets and hats beside Paul Bunyan’s camp fire, but it was actually quite cold and windy out here in the desert. When the wind blew one way, it was cold. When it blew the other you got blasted in the face with a serious heat wave. To escape this wind we camped behind a little hill.

Check out this little video clip to get a better sense of this thing:

Alan, Ron, Linda, Rustam and the drivers enjoyed a nice barbecued chicken dinner by our normal-person sized fire. Meanwhile, I ran in circles trying to escape the insane number of desert spiders creepy-crawling about. The cool grandpa taught us the trick of chilling a bottle of wine by wrapping it in a wet cloth.

In the morning we checked out the crater by daylight, which made us appreciate having arrived so late at night, so that we saw it for the first time in all its glowing glory. It’s still pretty incredible by day, but the night is the time to see it!

On the drive out we stopped to see two other craters of note: one with a bubbling mud base and another filled with a beautiful green water.

We also stopped for the obligatory desert sand jumping. Remind anyone of our visit to White Sand National Monument in New Mexico?

And then we had our first camel jam of our trip. (On the highway.) Too funny.

On our way to Ashgabat we stopped in the small village of Bokurdak for lunch and a little glimpse into Turkmen village life. I was of course enticed by the dogs (Turkmen dogs are typically shepherd dogs called Alabai, and large hounds called Tazy, which are often used in conjunction with a falcon for a Turkmen hunting tri-fecta). Their Alabai was only five months old and already quite large (and insanely energetic!). Apparently these things get enormous. I’m going to have to see about importing one of these guys. Our border crossing experiences tell me this is not going to be easy.

Lunch was preceded by a lovely introduction, including the reciting of a Turkmen poem by the homeowner’s youngest daughter, after which we sat down to a feast of lamb soup, lamb plov, these little “crackers” that are essentially small packets of dough fried in cottonseed oil, and our first taste of camel milk. (Yes, really.) Think soupy, salty yogurt. Though they put out a whole pitcher, we did not make a big dent (but propers to Ron for finishing his serving). We found it amusing too that the baby camel (which, by the way, how cute is he?!) is kept tethered away from it’s momma so he doesn’t hog all the camel milk. On our brief tour we learned that these villagers live on subsistence farming, felt-making and cattle breeding. They had an SUV and some kind of washing machine, but the toilet was still a wooden shed with a hole in the ground. After seeing the camel pen and being schooled on the useful properties of saxaul, we got a little demonstration of how she makes yarn from the camel’s wool and then we were on our way to the capital city.

We didn’t have much time in Turkmenistan’s capital city of Ashgabat, so we can’t opine all that much on the place. It is known for an abundance of white marble buildings and garish sights. I’m not sure what remains, but I know the former President Niyazov had erected a gold statue of himself, which revolved to follow the sun throughout the day. Anyway, black to Planet Earth. In the little time we did have, we went out to the Russian Bazaar via what I will call paid hitchhiking. Apparently illegal taxi-cab drivers abound in these parts, and we procured a ride from a non-English speaking older Turkmen guy smoking a cigarette and blasting “Barbie Girl.” Needless to say this brought me great pleasure. The Russian Bazaar/Altyn Asyr was a mix of a mall with cotton wares and an outdoor food market, which is organized and refrigerated. After a guy told Alan he was not allowed to take pictures (this is a market, not a military building?!), we bought provisions for a little picnic and ate dinner back at the hotel. Aside from this brief excursion, what I can tell you about Ashgabat is that there is a lovely, if smoggy, view of the mountains (on the other side of which lies Iran).

Practical Info

We booked most of our Silk Road trip through Jim O. at Tailor-made Adventures (somehow affiliated with Dragoman and Imaginative Traveller). For reasons we won’t get into here, we would not enthusiastically recommend his services. Though the team he organized in Turkmenistan was great. It would be extremely difficult, if not impossible, to visit Turkmenistan independently. I think the government pretty much requires you to travel with a licensed operator. Anyway, English is not widely spoken and there are many nuances and formalities that would be tough to negotiate on your own.

I do not recall whether my dad and Linda could have obtained visas in advance since they were coming from home, but in any event we all arrived with an invitation letter that the travel agency had obtained for us. At the border, we paid $66 each (comprised of something like $55 for the visa, $10 for immigration, and a $1 bank fee), and they were much less fussy about the bills than the class act at immigration in Uzbekistan. Though we may have just gotten a lucky teller that day.

We covered our land-entry in depth above. We departed by land, as well, at the Farab crossing from near Turkmenabat (Turkmenistan) towards Bukhara (Uzbekistan). Our experience was similar in terms of time commitment and absurdity. Except this time we took a short van ride for 1 Manat each, and then we had to walk about a mile through no-man’s land with all our bags. Fortunately it wasn’t the middle of the summer, when the temperature could be 120º+ (nor the freezing cold winter).

By the way, what’s the deal with the no-man’s land in between countries? Is it actually part of one country? What if Jenni just couldn’t take it any more and beat me silly? Would she have committed a crime? According to whose laws?

The exchange rate was 1USD = 2.85 Turkmenistan Manat. It was much easier to exchange money here than Uzbekistan…we did this at the market when we bought liquor, and we didn’t have to show our passport or fill out forms!

Transportation: Ashgabat is the capital city and where your international flight would likely (definitely?) land. We were met by SUVs at the border by Dashoguz and traveled in these the whole time, until we flew from Ashgabat to Turkmenabat. Domestic flights are only on Turkmenistan Airlines. We flew a new Boeing 717 and it was fine. Though we paid for almost everything as part of our tour package, we did see the receipt for our domestic flight: $26/ticket, including all fees etc. From the airport in Turkmenabat, we took two more SUVs for the ~1 hour drive to the border crossing at Farab.

As in Uzbekistan, it seems “illegal” taxis are ubiquitous. We took these both ways between our Ashgabat hotel and the Russian Bazaar, and paid 6 Manat total each way.

Accommodation: In Ashgabat we stayed at Ak Altyn. It was fine, though a bit dated and our room kind of smelled like cigarettes. WiFi was available for $5/hour, but we did not try it. There is a Sofitel that gets good reviews. And someone told us he prefers the location of the Grand Hotel, which is closer to some sights (while Ak Altyn is in a quieter area).

Our only other night in the country was camping at the Darvaza gas crater, which was awesome.

Food: We had lunch after the border crossing at Hotel Uzboy in Dashoguz. The lentil soup was outstanding. Our only other meal aside from our time camping and at the village in Bokurdak was a picnic dinner with supplies purchased at the Russian Bazaar in Ashgabat. There was a lot to choose from, and there is some prepared food there, too. Cognac is very inexpensive.

Activities: It was interesting to see Konye-Urgench, but the drive from Dashoguz was about 1.5 hours each way, and you could skip it if you’re visiting a lot of other Silk Road sites. Because we are not history buffs and we did so much of this in Uzbekistan, we skipped places like Merv, Nissa, Gonur, etc. Our guide was adamant about the party scene on the Caspian Sea, but I’m not sure it would be as fun for a (non-Russian speaking) visitor.

For activities in or closer to Ashgabat, another guide we met mentioned horse farms you can visit, the National Musuem, and Kow Ata Underground Lake.

April 29 – May 1, 2014 (Tuesday-Thursday)

Khiva

Leaving Tashkent we flew to Urgench and then traveled by car to the desert fortresses (covered in our prior post) before arriving in Khiva. This was the first of many long drives across the ‘Stans. Looking back I think we greatly underestimated the amount of time we would be spending in cars during these three weeks, and while it often got tiring and I occasionally suffered from some bad-road-induced car sickness, we really enjoyed these chances to observe the less-seen nooks and crannies of Uzbekistan and its neighbors. While there is a whole lot of nothing, there is also a whole lot that’s interesting. The box-like houses that sporadically line the streets are all connected by exposed pipes carrying natural gas (a major natural resource of Uzbekistan). In general, we were struck by how much more prevalent colors like brown and grey (in the landscape and man-made structures) are here compared to supremely colorful places we visited like India and Sri Lanka. But in spurts, the red and yellow government subsidized houses dot the landscape like Ronald McDonald outposts. In sparser areas there are miles and miles of cotton and wheat fields and lining the streets is often a row of the silk worms’ favorite: mulberry trees. And of course, there are those donkey-pulled carts.

Khiva was the first major Silk Road city we visited. Among the Silk Road destinations in Uzbekistan, Khiva has a reputation for feeling more like a museum than Bukhara or Samarkand. The old city has been beautifully restored, but some fret it is now so polished and touristic that it has lost some of its living vibrancy. We can understand this sentiment, for when you enter through one of the four gates into the walled inner city (Itchan-Kala), the ancient mosques, madrasas, and caravanserais are all full and buzzing with shopkeepers and souvenir sellers (including some folks selling these incredible traditional Uzbek hats for the men, and lovely fur hats for the ladies. Alan and Ron look like 80s rock stars, no?), but at night it seems more of a ghost town.

In addition to the beautiful restoration, the sense that you’re in a museum is perhaps because the tightly compacted inner city means all these architectural gems and amazing sights are conveniently located a quick walk around, as though you are passing through a large, outdoor exhibit.

Our first night in town we walked up to a great vantage point atop the city walls to watch the sunset and get spectacular views of the blue and white tiles with a stunning evening light.

After sunset we had another hearty meal (hearty is a good word to describe every Uzbek meal), preceded by a medicinal vodka shot. Our guide informed us that taking a shot of vodka pre-meal helps the stomach to deal with any pesky digestion issues. Fact or fiction? We’re not sure.

The area in which Khiva is located is called Khorezm. Back in the day, people were named after where they came from, and so one man from this area, known as Al-Khawrizmi went on to become a pretty great mathematician. And it is from his name that we got the word for algorithm, and his book titled Kitab al-Jebr is where the word algebra derived from. Crazy, huh?

Among the other fascinating facts about the way life was in Khiva’s heyday, men sentenced to death were killed by impaling. And the punishment for adulterous women? They were placed in a sack with wild, giant Uzbek hornets that would sting them to death. What a way to go, eh? We were skeptical at first too, until we saw Uzbek hornets with our own eyes. They are enormous!

Within the Itchan Kala, the Kunya Ark is the old palace and a smaller fortress within the fortress. It was neat to learn some of the engineering and architectural intricacies, necessitated in part by the region’s extreme weather. Temperatures in Uzbekistan often plummet well below zero in the winter, and summers are scorching with readings of 120º and higher. So, for example, the ayvan of the Khan’s court faces north and tops out above the city walls, so it stays cooler in the summer by avoiding the sun and catching the breeze. We also learned that Uzbekistan generally has a high water table and high salinity, so drainage and irrigation were and are a common theme in land use and planning.

Apart from the scientific-leaning tidbits of knowledge, we heard many a tall tale. Legends and mythical heroes are commonplace in Central Asia. Thus when we visited the Mausoleum of Pakhlavan Mahmoud, a fur maker and undefeated wrestler, our guide explained not only the various parts of the building but regaled us with a 10-minute story about how the wrestler was summoned to India because a rajah wanted to see him battle a local strongman and this local’s mother begged Pakhlavan Mahmoud to let her son win so he would not be punished in defeat and Pakhlavan Mahmoud did this but then got in trouble because the rajah knew he threw the fight but then in a dramatic turn of events…We must have heard 30 stories like this during our time in Central Asia.

Khiva was only stop number one of the Silk Road for us, and I have to be honest, we aren’t the biggest history buffs in the world, so there was definitely a bit of mosque/fact/history overload. Even this early on. One way to help us break up the long stretches and let us digest the information was to break for elevensies. Um, how had I never heard this term before?! Elevensies, tensies, twelvsies! You stop in the morning for a cuppa and a quick bite! Obsessed. I was told by Mansur that there is no such thing as threesies, but you can bet every time I snack break, be it ninesies or midnightsies I’m adding a “sies.” This also makes me terribly excited to go to London. Just so I can have elevensies (with scones and clotted cream!). And I can also try out the new expression we learned…Instead of saying, “kill two birds with one stone,” I can use the Uzbek twist on this phrase and say “kill two rabbits with one bullet.” Like, “Dear, we’re a bit knackered and hungry, aren’t we? Why don’t we break for foursies and we’ll kill two rabbits with one bullet? Right, then, cheerio.” Anyways, I digress.

A trip to the Silk Road would be incomplete without learning about the silk making process, and when we stopped at a small demonstration and educational facility it was practically impossible to pull Ron and Alan away from a book detailing the complexities of the silk dying and carpet weaving process. A very quick explanation: silkworms eat the leaves of the mulberry trees and grow tons and spin a cocoon maybe one-third the size of a chicken egg. When you unwind the cocoon they’ve spun you can have up to a kilometer of silk ready to be softened and died. The actual weaving process takes lots of time and is incredibly detailed. We were very impressed by these hard-working ladies.

On our last evening in Khiva and feeling a bit done with the touristy museum kinda thing, we requested Mansur help us find a non-touristy restaurant. He happily obliged, but even he had to say it as we sat practically alone in a big open room and were served a whole, cold chicken slathered in ketchup and mayonnaise, that maybe we picked the wrong city to try and get off the tourist track. I was also amused walking back to our hotel that night that despite the many very modern streetlamps, not a single light was on. When I asked Mansur why, he said “what for? They use them when officials are in town.”

Practical Info 

Accommodation: We stayed at Malika Khorezm Hotel. It is located outside the old city walls, but within easy walking distance. Our room was huge and spartan but nice. The WiFi worked only in the lobby. We saw several options located inside the old city which might be a little more atmospheric, though everywhere felt like a ghost town at night.

Food: We dined at Hotel Kheivak in the old city. The hearty soup with rice and beef plus dill, and the pasta with meat and yogurt etc., came with vodka shots. Our second night we asked for a non-touristy place. Perhaps we picked the wrong city for this. There was hardly anyone else in the large room. There was no menu. Our whole chicken arrived half cold and slathered in ketchup and mayo. Actually, it was not bad. The vodka came in a small water glass, and our guide calls it medicine.

Activities: Our first evening in town we entered the Itchan Kala (the walled inner town of the city of Khiva) through the gates of Ata Darvaza (there are four gates, this is the west gate), and we walked up some stairs inside the Kunya Ark (the palace) for a vantage point with great views (especially at sunset). We paid 4k UZS each to enter. I’m not sure exactly how to find this place, but maybe if you ask for the sunset view place inside Kunya Ark then someone could point it out.

We had a full day sightseeing inside the Itchan Kala. We saw the Kunya Ark, the Mausoleum of Pakhlavan Mahmoud, the Juma Masjid (with its 213 wooden columns), some minarets and madrasas, and a great little silk making place with a book describing the process. A silk worm’s cocoon might be one kilometer long when unwound! Our guide handled everything but I think you may need a ticket to enter the Itchan Kala and then also for specific buildings, though I’m not certain.

April 27-29, 2014 (Sunday-Tuesday)

Welcome to Uzbekistan

Yup, you read that right. So began our travels to the peculiar and perplexing place that is Central Asia. Also colloquially known as the ‘Stans. Uzbekistan was the first stop on our trip along the Silk Road (we also ventured into Turkmenistan, Kyrgyzstan and Western China on this foray into the land of magic carpets). If you’re scratching your head and asking yourself “why in the world would one go to Uzbekistan?” well, you’re not alone. The response we received from many was, “where?” followed quickly by “why?” (or more frequently than I might have thought, “is that a country?”). So I suppose I’ll start with a very brief introduction to Uzbekistan and why/how we ended up here.

Uzbekistan is the most populous of the five nations typically considered to make up Central Asia (Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan, Tajikistan, Kyrgyzstan, and Turkmenistan), home to arguably the grandest of the Silk Road’s cities (Samarkand, Bukhara and Khiva). Given its central location, Uzbekistan was a required stop for the multitude of trading caravans shopping their silken (and other) wares. This region of the world has largely been home to nomadic peoples and served as a crossroads for the movement of not only goods, but people, cultures, ethnicities and ideas to and from Europe and Asia. It’s a historically fascinating place, full of architecturally stunning ancient mosques, caravanserais, and madrasas. It’s also home to many Turkic descendants, and to our surprise, a substantial number of Turkish speakers.

Uzbekistan is also a former member of the USSR, and this Soviet influence is palpable in many ways, the most obvious probably the red tape you fight through crossing its borders. We’ll cover our two Uzbek overland border crossings separately (and do stay tuned because they were two of the strangest and most infuriating days of our lives. A truly unique travel experience that may not be rivaled outside this part of the world). And that alone almost sums up what we sought out of this visit: an experience unlike others. A chance to visit a part of the world rarely seen by people in our hometowns, and a place not so well understood. We learned an incredible amount while in these countries, largely because we knew so little about them beforehand, and in part because we had very informative tour guides unlike much of our independent travels. I should also mention that we were joined here by Alan’s father, Ron, and his wife Linda. We were also accompanied for the majority of this trip by local guides, as we booked this trip through a travel agent and decided (wisely) that these countries would be too difficult (if not impossible and at times prohibited) to visit independently.

With the exception of the characters we met at Uzbekistan’s borders, we generally found the people in this nation to be pleasant and friendly, and we were touched by their genuine curiosity and excitement to see us. This mutual fascination was so poignantly displayed one day while we were touring some of the mosques alongside a group of women from rural Uzbekistan. I’m not sure who started photographing whom, but we all stood there looking at each other through the lens of our cameras and laughing.

The people of Uzbekistan are predominantly Muslim, but it is not an Islamic state. In fact, the government suppresses religious expression by banning full-face veils and long beards. Our guides here and in Turkmenistan were adamant about how the people are Muslim but not fundamentalist and still like alcohol etc., which gave us a somewhat modern and progressive impression of the country. But in many ways, it feels like Uzbekistan is a nation stuck in time. What time I’m not exactly sure. The Soviet Era? It was certainly a time before smoking was banned in public establishments and hotel rooms. The stale smell of cigarette smoke lingering in old fabrics permeates the air of most establishments, including all of our hotel rooms. In fact, the first time we got an option for a non-smoking room was weeks later in Kyrgyzstan, and the non-smoking floor was one of ten plus floors in the massive hotel. And while there are a lot of the modern conveniences that you tend to associate with developed countries, there is a distinctly quaint, pastoral even, quality to the place. So, for example, while you will see modern roads and pedestrian crossing lights, there are also donkey-drawn carts on those roads (and cows and sheep and horses).

One of the first things visitors to Uzbekistan learn is that the money situation is absurd. What do I mean by this? Well, credit cards are accepted at approximately zero locations throughout the country. Cash is obtainable via ATMs, which are conveniently located at approximately two locations in the nation. In the capital city of Tashkent, only. And these ATMs dispense only USD, which you will then need to take to the bank (or the streets, as black market money exchanges are common) to exchange them for Uzbekistan Sum (UZS). And bring your biggest purse/suitcase/trashbag because the largest bills you are likely to find are 1,000s (and, on the rare occasion, 5,000s). Ladies and gents, let me break this down for you. 1,000 UZS = $0.43 USD. That’s 43 CENTS. That means when you exchange one US$100 bill you receive about 230 UZS bills! We quickly learned that a skill unique to the Uzbek is the ability to count legal tender in rapid-fire succession. Our guide, Mansur, did his best to teach us. On multiple occasions. But there is no rivaling one with a lifetime’s experience of counting out a three-inch thick stack of bills to pay for his borscht. I suppose it goes without saying that I was forced on multiple occasions to fight the urge to make it rain UZS. Among the next things you will learn about money in this nation: it must be reported. You must declare on arrival the exact amount of cash (USD, UZS or otherwise) you are carrying into the country. And then you must declare exactly how much you are taking out of the country upon your exit. And if that number somehow gets bigger, be prepared to explain. Never mind that there are ATMs, you will need proof. Oh, one last fun fact about currency in Uzbekistan. USD is often accepted, sometimes appreciated. But not just any old American dollars. The Uzbek have a policy on USD, which is to say that if it has even the most minuscule tear or even a smidgen of writing, you might as well consider it toilet paper. No, my friends, the Uzbek will have none of your shitty, dirty, written on or torn USD. You will need pristine bills. Not even kidding, that we held up the line at the airport for a good ten minutes as the man in charge of processing our visa on arrival sat there and rejected bill after bill after bill of the same United States dollars that every single US establishment will gladly accept. And don’t expect this same quality in your stacks of Uzbek cash, the rules may as well be opposite.

After sorting out our money, we were finally ready to get out and see what Uzbekistan was all about. Armed with pockets full of (not so valuable) cash, we set out for a tour of Tashkent, the capital city. Our accommodation, Hotel Uzbekistan, stands in a prime location, overlooking a large square centered by the statue of Amir Temur, the national hero. In fact, much of the city is covered by big, beautiful, green squares and parks, well-manicured gardens surrounding statues, monuments and buildings. The manicuring extends to the buildings, the streets, even the subways and the meat market – it’s an impressively clean city. And that subway. Let me tell you, it is just stunningly beautiful. Each station is decorated differently and my particular favorite was very art deco, with marble walls and columns and super in-right-now brass fixtures. Unfortunately, as with many sights in Uzbekistan, the taking of pictures in the subway is strictly prohibited (hellooooo nonsensical Soviet era rules and hyper paranoia!).

We checked out a local market where Alan and Ron indulged in their first taste of horse meat. Again, you heard correctly. Horse meat is a popular treat here, and according to Alan, it’s quite tasty when spiced up and served with noodles. Linda and I stuck to the bread on this occasion. There’s just something about eating a horse…it’s not quite a dog, but…I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Which brings me to Uzbek cuisine, and really Central Asian food in general. This is what the header of the Uzbek visa application should read: vegetarians need not apply. The options are typically meat, meat or meat. A typical meal is bread, a soup made with meat, potatoes in the soup and perhaps elsewhere, and then one of plov (made with rice and either lamb or beef), kebabs (again, beef or lamb), or manti (like a meat filled ravioli). We became all too familiar with these dishes as the variation of food all across the ‘Stans was close to non-existent. In fact, none of the ‘Stans we visited have any Western chains! We realized at this point how unusual it is that a significant chunk of our time over the course of this trip was spent in countries (and cities) with no McDonald’s. At first, this is an amusing, even impressive fact. After three weeks of plov and instant coffee, the lack of Starbucks seems a devastating flaw.

We were surprised by how clean, refrigerated and orderly the markets are. These are not your typical developing country markets with potent odors and abundant hazards for those sporting flip-flops. It was here in this market that we also got our first glimpse of the redonkulous junk-in-the-trunk sheep butts. (I’m not even ashamed to use the word redonkulous. You should see these lamb bums in action. They swing back and forth when they walk. It is ALL. FAT. In fact, every time a fat-tailed sheep walks by an angel starts singing Sir Mix-a-Lot’s classic.) And the Uzbeks love that ish. Sheep bum is everywhere.

The old town was our first chance to glimpse the beautiful blue and white decorated architecture that is so characteristic of the Silk Road. It’s pretty incredible to see the contrast of these old, intricate and colorful buildings next to the stark, cold Soviet architecture throughout much of the city. We were also fascinated to see the old neighboring homes made of mud and straw and with no windows to the street (so as to allow the ladies to be able to walk around uncovered without risk of being seen, back in the day). We also scoped out the world’s oldest Quran (printed on deer skin!) and a madrasa (Muslim school) before heading back to our nice-in-a-dated-way hotel to recover from jetlag.

From Tashkent we flew to Urgench and first visited some ancient fortresses before settling in Khiva for two nights. This area holds many fortresses in varied states of preservation, and we stopped to see Ayaz-Kala and Tuprak-Kala. These mud and clay structures are still standing after many hundreds of years. We really appreciated visiting these because they are so remote. Standing on top of these, looking out at the miles and miles of desert nothingness, you can start to get a sense of what it must have been like to travel on camel for weeks, waiting for signs of life and civilization as you make your way through the unforgiving heat and miles of endless terrain.

Practical Info

We booked most of our Silk Road trip through Jim O. at Tailor-made Adventures (somehow affiliated with Dragoman and Imaginative Traveller). I think you could visit Uzbekistan independently if you have a really tight budget and/or you are very adventurous, but I probably would not recommend it. English is not widely spoken and there are many nuances and formalities that would be tough to negotiate on your own. Besides, the history is arguably the main draw, and a good guide can explain it all and make the sights more interesting.

I am not sure if US citizens need an invitation letter to visit Uzbekistan. We were unable to obtain visas prior to leaving for Asia, and Jim was able to get us an official invitation letter from the proper Uzbekistan ministry such that we got a visa on arrival in Tashkent (after a bit of paperwork beforehand and $160 per visa on arrival). They were absurdly strict regarding the quality of the USD bills they would accept. If there was a 1mm tear or the slightest marking, forget it. It is almost entirely a cash-based country, so be sure the USD (or Euros, perhaps) you bring are pristine and ample. The official exchange rate was 1 USD = ~2270 Uzbekistan Sum (UZS), but the black market rate was more like 1 USD = 2750 UZS. We never tried to use an ATM. There was one in our hotel in Tashkent, but the guide said it dispenses USD so you would still have to exchange foreign cash for local cash.

Note that there may be several variations of how certain words are spelled (e.g. Khauz, Hauz, Xauz or Haus), so be patient and creative if you Google things and don’t get exact results.

Transportation: Our agent arranged everything. We had a private car for most of the trip, and we also flew from Tashkent to Urgench (on Uzbekistan Airlines, which was perfectly fine on an A320…Urgench is the nearest airport to Khiva) and took an amazingly nice high-speed train from Samarkand back to Tashkent. The roads were generally very bad, though it was smoother driving from Tashkent to the Kyrgyz border (at Osh, Kyrgyzstan) than it was driving in the western part of the country.

I love the taxi situation in Uzbekistan (and Turkmenistan). In most places (Samarkand had more official taxis), everyone uses “illegal” cabs. Which are just guys who give you a ride for a negotiated price. What you pay depends on how many passengers you are, which makes sense because they usually try to fill their car. It ends up being incredibly cheap (like $1-4 total to go most places intra-city), and since there is no meter you do not have to worry about getting the drive-around.

The subway in Tashkent has some beautiful stations (no photos allowed), and a token costs only 800 UZS.

Accommodation: In Tashkent we stayed at Hotel Uzbekistan. It is large and a bit dated, but kind of an experience. There is a barber shop on the top floor. The WiFi is free and works fairly well. The breakfast spread was quite a bit more substantial than other places we stayed. Our last night we had dinner across from the International Hotel (the old Intercontinental), and this seemed to be the more business-oriented area.

Food: We had dinner at Yolki Palki, a Russian chain. It was not bad, and the staff spoke English (107k UZS). Our last night we had dinner at Siesta. I think this is also a chain, but it did not feel like one. We spent 135k UZS for food and a bottle of lousy local wine. We were the only ones in the joint, but the service was great.

Much more exciting was the hot food section at/near Chorsu Bazaar loaded with manti, breads, grilled meats and noodles with ground horse meat. Which my dad and I ate, and it was delicious. The halva was tasty and very cheap at 6000 UZS/kg.

Activities: One day in Tashkent is all we had, and that’s probably all you need (well you don’t really need any, but it’s pleasant enough as part of your transit). We walked around Amir Temur Square (in front of our hotel) and Independence Square before taking the subway to Chorsu Bazaar. The bazaar was enjoyable. We strolled through the old town where the homes have walls made of mud and straw and there are no windows onto the street. Next we visited a large square (fairly certain this was the Khast Imam complex) where there is a mosque, a converted madrasa housing craft shops (we soon learned this is very common in Uzbekistan), and a small building that holds the world’s oldest Quran.

I believe there are mountains within a 1-2 hour drive from Tashkent where you can ski in the winter.

April 26-27 + May 6-7, 2014 (Saturday-Sunday + Tuesday-Wednesday)

Afiyet Olsun

We definitely accomplished our mission in Istanbul. We had two goals in mind: spend time with Jenni’s family and eat lots of Turkish food. We even combined these, and had great times with family over fantastic eats.

We really enjoyed this chance to experience a place more as a local would. Rather than focus exclusively on the big tourist attractions (many of which we’ve both seen on prior visits), we primarily explored the residential area of Kadiköy where my cousin lives and where we stayed. We adored this part of town. There are so many people out and about (it helped that we had fantastic spring weather most days), and dozens of pedestrian-friendly cobblestone streets lined with cafes, bars, doner kebab shops, baklava bakeries and other establishments.

He also lives near the waterfront, and we walked down to Moda Park one evening to enjoy the sunset, the spectacular view of the mosque-dotted skyline (with the sounds of prayer calls of the muezzin in the distance), and a couple of beers with Şans’ friends.

The food was obviously a highlight throughout our visit. (The title of this post is Turkish for “bon appetit,” probably the most frequently used phrase uttered to us while here 😉 My aunt Gül spoiled us with a delicious waterfront dinner at the Kalamiş Marina one night, where we all had a fantastic time catching up over much, much rakı and lots of tasty food. Another night she and her boyfriend treated us again to a feast of a home cooked meal, complete with several of my favorite dishes (mücver and sigara börek) as well as a few new and tasty discoveries (some fantastic cheeses and a lamb studded hummus). This is not to mention even the main course! And we had picked up some baklava and other pastries from Bilgeoğlu, which (along with the rice pudding Gül made) complemented our feast wonderfully. I also discovered that a certain type of baklava is made with cream from water buffalo’s milk – fascinating. And delicious.

Another night we had a great meal with Şans and his friends at Meyhane Meyhane, where we enjoyed great conversation, lots of cold mezze and, again, lots of rakı.

The best iskender of our lives was at Kebapçı İskender. Phenomenal. They bring out a plate adorned with the most delicious and tender lamb laid over bread cubes, with yogurt and smoky eggplant dips, and then table-side they pour hot butter from the frying pan all over it. Scrumptious.

Perhaps it was the effect of just having spent four plus months in Southeast Asia, and coming from a city as crazy as Kathmandu, but we were both struck by how modern we found Istanbul this time around (and this despite that I’d visited a mere two years ago). What was more interesting to us was that the popular, more touristy areas (like Eminönü with so many mosques and bazaars) on the European side actually feel less western and less modern than those over on the more residential Asian side (like Kadiköy, where we stayed with my cousin). We were both reminded how huge the city is, sprawling far further it seems than the last times we visited.

Among the things that I love about Istanbul and Turkey more generally: (1) My family, obvs. (2) İskender. (3) The people are so friendly! It seems people are always excited to converse with one another, and they are quick to help. For instance, when we grabbed a cab to dinner my cousin chatted animatedly with our driver the whole way there, and when we were wandering around the wrong ferry station looking confused two people stopped and offered us much appreciated assistance. (4) Cats. Everywhere. Just, everywhere. (5) Finding things with our names on them! The Çağlayan Princess (my maiden name) boat was a gem of a find, and we even discovered a little shop right near my cousin’s place that is called Alper (my father’s name)! (6) Using my (extremely) limited knowledge of the Turkish language (must learn more!). Alan got a kick out of learning that some of the key phrases I remembered from childhood were phrases that translate to “don’t do it, son” and “good job, daughter.” Does this say something about me and my brother? Among the other essential phrases I’ve retained: “is there any bread?” and “you’re the son of a donkey” have clearly come in the most handy.

On our more touristy excursions we took the ferry over to the European side of town. One day we visited Eminönü and meandered through the café lined streets to the Ayasofya. We were blown away by the crowds: we waited in quite the line to get into the Ayasofya, and the lines across the street for the Cisterns looked even less fun. Despite the scaffolding, we were amazed by the mix of church and mosque in this beautiful old structure.

After taking a few photos by the Blue Mosque, we stopped for a cup of salep (another favorite of mine – a hot milky, spiced drink). And then we got our doner kebab fill before venturing into the impressively expansive Grand Bazaar and the even more densely packed Spice Bazaar.

Another day we ferried over to Beyoğlu and poked around the funky gift shops, cafes and pedestrian (mostly) mall near Galata Tower. We were surprised to discover a Shake Shack opened up here, but having gorged on so much Turkish food we had to skip it. My first taste of Shake Shack will have to wait until New York this summer. We enjoyed the Henryk Tomaszewski poster exhibit at SALT and later our final taste of baklava at Güllüoğlu before hopping on the ferry back to Kadiköy.

Practical Info

Istanbul is a booming city, very large in terms of population (some unofficial estimates put it at nearly 20 million!) and area. There are countless historical sights and a thriving cafe and visual arts scene. It is relatively easy to navigate. We did not drink tap water but generally ate fruits and vegetables with no issues. ATMs and credit card acceptance are everywhere, as are most amenities you’d expect in any Western city.

Some years back, Turkey made the helpful decision to drop six zeroes from its currency, so the exchange rate is now a much more manageable 1 USD = 2.1 Turkish Lira (“TRY”).

Transportation: Şans picked us up at the airport and it was a fairly long drive to Kadıköy with traffic. For our departing flight, we took the ferry at 8 pm going from Kadıköy to Bakırköy. Tickets cost 7.50 TRY each and it took ~20 minutes. From the Bakırköy terminal we walked to the parking lot and took a taxi, which we shared with another guy. Each passenger paid 10 for the taxi and that took another ~20 minutes. It was pretty much an hour door to door from Kadıköy to the airport.

Taxis are widely available and pretty cheap. Though drivers do not always speak English, thus getting a ride to Jenni’s aunt’s apartment required a bit of guessing what the other was saying and the use of an iPhone map. We used ferries for the return trips between Kadıköy and Eminönü and Kadıköy and Karaköy. Each token costs 3 TRY each way. It is cheaper if you buy a card. We did not use the trams or metro, but many do.

Accommodation: We stayed with Jenni’s cousin in the Moda section of Kadıköy. We loved the area. It is filled with cobblestone streets, cafes, restaurants, sidewalk seating, a lovely waterfront park, etc. And very few tourists. Ferries leave often and take only 20-30 minutes to reach Eminönü or Karaköy. I think most tourists would probably rather stay closer to the concentration of attractions in the Eminönü and Galata/Beyoğlu areas. I am using these neighborhood terms somewhat loosely. I’ve not done research on the details of sub-districts etc., but I think if you look at a map you’ll get what I mean.

Food: Be ready for lamb, bread and sweets. The namesake item at Kebapçı İskender (covered above), multiple locations I think, we ate in Kadıköy near the ferries and PTT building was terrific . It was not cheap at 44 TRY for the 1.5x portion with smoky eggplant, but worth every penny. Doner kebab is available everywhere and often has french fries inside the package. It usually costs 4-12 TRY.

Dinner at Paysage at the Kalamış Marina offered lovely sunset views. We enjoyed mezze, superb calamari, lots of rakı, and more. We were generously treated, and I think it is pricy. This area is quite upscale and we saw many restaurants by the marina and along Bağdat Caddesi (aka Baghdad Avenue), which also has high end shopping.

One night we ate with Şans and his friends at Meyhane (which means something like “tavern”, but was also the specific name of this place) in Kadıköy, which was good and located on a lively street with outdoor seating everywhere. Breakfast at Munchies (also in Kadıköy, basically across the street from Şans’ apartment) meant several pancakes with about 10 ramekins filled with jams, honey, nutella, peanut butter, etc., along with some Turkish meats and cheese. It was delectable. Iced coffee at 180º was solid.

Simit (“a circular bread, typically encrusted with sesame seeds and a fluffy interior”) for 1 TRY is ubiquitous from street carts.

On Jenni’s prior visit in 2011, she dined at Münferit in Beyoğlu and liked it a lot.

Activities: We went light on the tourist activities as we’ve both been before, and we enjoyed experiencing the city a little more like locals. We still visited the Ayasofya (30 TRY each to enter), the Grand Bazaar and the Spice Bazaar, plus we spent an afternoon walking around the Galata and Beyoğlu neighborhoods and poked our heads in at SALT Beyoğlu.

Other popular sights and activities include the Blue Mosque; Topkapi Palace; the Cisterns; Galata Tower; Istanbul Modern; a Bosporus straits cruise; the Princes’ Islands in the Sea of Marmara. It would have been fun to attend a Fenerbahçe football match. If you try to do this, investigate whether men are banned from the stadium at that time!

April 21-25, 2014 (Monday-Friday)

Kathmandu

Kathmandu stands in stark contrast to the peacefulness of the Himalayan trekking getaways. It’s funny because when we first arrived to Kathmandu, we were somewhat underwhelmed by the “craziness” of it all. We’d heard it’s a chaotic melee of activity (including cows in the roads, just like India!), and it’s certainly a hectic place, but we weren’t overwhelmed in any sense of the word. I guess a month of traveling in India has the ability to make most other places seem calm. But after two weeks of trekking in the Himalayas, away from cars and many people, coming back to Kathmandu felt far more sensorially stimulating, the city more frenzied than we’d remembered, maybe even just a touch overwhelming. That said, even in our post-mountain zen we did not find the people to be aggressive or intrusive the way the hawkers can be in some frenetic Asian cities.

It’s probably for the best then, that we did the majority of our touristy sight-seeing stuff pre-trekking. Included in the price of our trek through Himalayan Glacier was a full day tour of many of Kathmandu’s highlights. Our first full day spent in town was occupied by this, as our lovely guide (Paras) showed us these fascinating sites. The Kathmandu Valley has seven groups of monuments and buildings together classified as one UNESCO World Heritage Site. We visited several of them on our day tour, including the Durbar Square of Hanuman Dhoka (the formal name for Kathmandu’s Durbar Square), the Buddhist stupas of Swayambhunath and Boudhanath, and the Hindu temple of Pashupatinath.

Durbar Square is a stunning collection of ancient buildings with some very intricate wood carving details. One of these buildings (the Kumari Ghar) is where the Kumari lives. We will borrow heavily from Wikipedia here…Kumari “is the tradition of worshiping young pre-pubescent girls as manifestations of the divine female energy or devi in Hindu religious traditions.”There are several Kumaris, but the most revered in Nepal is the Royal Kumari of Kathmandu. In a nice illustration of the religious harmony that pervades Nepal, “eligible girls are Buddhists from the Newar Shakya caste,”even though this is mostly a Hindu concept. Tourists gather in the courtyard of the Kumari Ghar, and if you are lucky (as we were) the Kumari will appear in the window for a few minutes. No photos may be taken while the Kumari is in sight. We are told that in earlier times the Kumari never returned post-pubescence to any semblance of a normal life, but these days she might go on to marry etc.

Alan rubbed his back on the post in Kasthamandap (origin of Kathmandu), which is believed to heal back pain. His condition post-trek does not fully support this theory, but perhaps it would have been worse!

We also scoped out the hippie temple where masses of hippies came to smoke hashish and hang out back in the 60’s and 70’s. There are still many foreign tourists and expats in Kathmandu and the liberal vibe is palpable, but the prevalence of stoners seems substantially reduced from the glory days.

This beautiful white building is where coronation ceremonies took place when Nepal had a monarchy.

We saw some examples of the different architectural styles present here. Our guide explained that the white, missile shaped shikhara temple is of Indian influence, but the pagoda actually originated in Nepal.

We climbed the steep, narrow wooden steps to the top of the nine floor palace. The views of the city and surroundings were excellent, and this was about the extent of our training for the trek.

Have you heard of Garuda Airlines in Indonesia? We learned while viewing this statue that Garuda is the form of transport for Vishnu.

The monkey temple is a little bit outside the main tourist area of the city, but worth the drive, if only to watch the monkeys play in (and superman jump into) the pool for a while. Does watching monkeys play ever get old? I don’t think so. While you’re there, make sure to throw a coin into the little pond and make a wish.

The views from the top of the temple were lovely, and we were surprised to find there is a whole little village up at the top. We spun the Tibetan prayer wheels, and listened to a brief talk about Thanka painting mandalas. They said some take years to paint, and the detail is so fine they need to use a brush with three hairs. Talk about patience. Perhaps most interestingly we learned that Tibetans take the bodies of the dead, chop them up and feed them to the vultures.

We were also a bit surprised to learn that there is a bomb test center nearby. This education came as a result of the first blast, so we were rather alarmed initially. We also happened to snap this photo of a napping monkey right as a bomb went off. They are so used to it they only bat one eye 😉

The Boudhanath is a large stupa lined with some shops, cafés, guesthouses and rooftop spots. For some reason it struck us as a bit Disneyland like, even though it is a major pilgrimage site.

Lastly, we went to Pashupatinath, one of the most important Shiva temples. Paras told us about the big annual festival held here (I think it is Mahashivaratri), where a lot of hashish is enjoyed by the locals. The temple itself is open only to Hindus, so non-Hindu tourists just get this epic view of bull balls.

Nearby there is a river where cremation ceremonies are conducted. Our experience here versus India’s Varanasi was more subdued as the locals in the area were much less abrasive. There were no people harassing us or trying to get our money (that said, we did have a guide with us this time). We found in interesting that there is a Nepali governmental project to move over to electric cremation as part of an effort to improve the environment.

Our non-tour-guided time in Kathmandu was largely spent in Thamel, the crowded tourist hub of restaurants, bars, gear and souvenir shops. Pre-trek, we were mostly shopping for gear in the North-Fake and others shops, post-trek meandering around to donate our used goods and admiring the trinkets on sale.

There are countless eateries and we particularly enjoyed Pumpernickel Bakery’s goat cheese sandwiches. The vibe and people watching at Or2k’s upstairs, young hippyish crowd, sit on cushions on floor restaurant was hard to beat. We also really enjoyed our welcome dinner at Nepali Chulo, where we were entertained by traditional Nepali dancing (and a man who called himself the human goat) as we tried our first tastes of Nepal’s chicken momo (like Nepal, a beautiful hybrid of Indian and Chinese influences –it’s like a Chinese dumpling stuffed with Indian curry), dhal baht and other local treats. The rice wine also flowed freely all night, poured from impressive heights down into our little dishes.

Alan had been exceptionally lucky in terms in of getting sick in South Asia. In fact, so many times Jenni would call to check in with her parents and have the following conversation: “guess what? She’s sick again. How’s Alan? Fine.,” that they started referring to him as Superman. As luck would have it, Alan finally succumbed to a bit of illness on our very last day in South Asia, the two of us in poor health and spirits for our final days in this colorful country. It helped that our hotel had HBO and we could lay in bed and watch movies to recover. It didn’t help that with the near constant power cuts we were lucky to catch a movie in its entirety.

Practical Info

US citizens need a visa to enter Nepal, and this may be obtained on arrival, though doing it in advance would’ve saved us an hour at the airport. We filled out a form, then waited on a long line to pay the fee. Once you’ve paid, you need to get on another line to get your visa. The line for the 30-day visa was by far the longest. The fees are as follows, and you can pay with a credit card for $1 extra: transit for $5, 1-15 days for $25, 30 days for $40, 90 days for $100.

We bought SIM cards at NCell. You need a passport photo and a copy of your passport. It took us many attempts to locate a SIM-card retailer with both a copier and functioning electricity. The card and service are very cheap. We paid ~$11 for 1GB of fast data (which accounted for ~$7 of the cost and included unlimited slower data within that same 30 days once you’ve used your 1GB) and a bit of phone time. Local calls and calls to the US were under 3 cents/minute.

Our tour guide was Paras Mani Amgain. We liked him, and you can reach him at mani.paras@gmail.com and +977-9841-638710.

The hospital where we went with the woman suffering altitude sickness is Swacon International Hospital Pvt. Ltd., 164 Rudreshwar Marg, Battisputali, Kathmandu, Nepal. Email info@swaconhospital.com and phone +977-01-4470588. We don’t know if it’s good or not, but it’s where our tour company takes clients at least for altitude sickness.

All over Thamel are places that will do laundry for 50/kg.

There are several shipping agents in Thamel. We were surprised by how expensive it is to ship things, even if one does not care about speedy delivery. We settled on TNT located one floor down from Himalayan Glacier’s office. After packaging, our 9.3kg duffel bag was rounded up to 11kg, and it cost ~$150 to ship to the US (with a tracking number).

Transportation: The airport is about 15-45 minutes from Thamel, depending on traffic. Taxis are cheap. You can walk everywhere in Thamel.

Accommodation: Hotel Shanker is in the Lazimpat neighborhood and a 5-10 minute walk to Thamel. We had a few nights here included in our trek package. There is a nice pool and the old-world decor is charming, but we didn’t love the room (though 103 was better than 101). And WiFi costs ~$10/day and can only be used on one device at a time. The included breakfast spread was very good. For the price (it’s around $100/night), we were not terribly impressed and preferred the cheaper options available in Thamel.

Hotel Norbu Linka is in Thamel and we stayed here the night our April 3 flight to Lukla was canceled. It is pretty well-located in Thamel, the free WiFi was OK and the included breakfast was nowhere near Hotel Shanker’s but better than Hotel Access…where we stayed our last four nights. Hotel Access is right in the center of the Thamel action and next door to the legendary Kathmandu Guest House. The WiFi was OK, the staff was friendly. Power cuts were constant, though I think this is the case most places.

If you are in Kathmandu only a handful of days, and especially if you are trying to organize a trek and/or purchase gear, then staying in Thamel is probably your best bet. It is crowded and hectic, but not in a terribly aggressive or offensive kind of way. By far the greatest concentration of gear shops and tourist-oriented restaurants and bars are in Thamel. If you are here longer or just desire a more laid-back location, then you may want to stay elsewhere.

Food: Pumpernickel Bakery was our go-to spot (we probably ate 10 goat cheese sandwiches there over the course of our stay). Our welcome dinner with Himalayan Glacier was at Nepali Chulo where we had the set menu accompanied by live music and traditional dance. The food was abundant and very good. Or2K is vegetarian with floor cushions and was OK. K-too Steakhouse offers a large chateaubriand for 1160 and half pound burgers for ~700. I thought it was fairly good but Jenni was not a fan. We got large and tasty chicken wraps at the stand Chick ’N’Falafel for 230. Himalayan Java is a coffee shop that would be at home in Venice. The brew is good but the service meh. Dinner in the nice courtyard of Funky Buddha was enjoyable. Rum Doodle is a huge place with OK food. All these spots are in Thamel except for Nepali Chulo. Pizza at La Dolce Vita (across from Hotel Access) was solid.

Activities: On our city tour we covered many of the highlights, including Durbar Square; Swayambhunath (aka Monkey Temple); Boudhanath (home to a large Buddhist stupa); and Pashupatinath (an important Hindu temple of Shiva, there are also cremation ghats here). There are entrance fees for some or all of these sites but everything was included in our trek package. I would say Durbar Square is a must-see, and we enjoyed the rest but if we had to cut out one for time constraints we would probably cut Boudhanath.

There are countless day trips available to various sites and activities, including some viewpoints of the Himalayas, cycling, bungee jumping, white water rafting, etc. Also in the Kathmandu Valley are the towns of Bhaktapur and Patan.

April 1-4 and 16-21, 2014 (Tuesday-Friday and Wednesday-Monday)

Seeking Oxygen

Post Kala Patthar, after a hearty breakfast, we began our rapid fire descent, flying down from Gorak Shep, past the memorials for Everest climbers who perished, in time for lunch at Thukla around noon. We said goodbye to Andrew as he ventured off to tackle Island Peak, and geared up for a very snowy walk down to Pheriche.

I never said I’d be the most attractive hiker on the mountain, but I hadn’t quite realized my cold, snowstorm outfit would be this sexy:

Pheriche, where we slept on our first night descending, was a surprisingly large town. I think a number of trekkers on the traditional EBC route stop here on the ascent. We were delighted to find that this tea house turned the stove on early in the afternoon and in the morning. Talk about living large!

The next day was a full day of “downhill.” In reality, I think we may have actually ascended more on this day than we ever did on a day of actual “uphill” climbing! I might be exaggerating, and my mind might have mentally checked out of trekking once we hit the “big four.” But, man, was it hard to motivate this day. I kidded with Rishi often, “so when do we get the helicopter?” Little did I know, it pays to be whiny! 😉

This day of descending brought us through much of the EBC trail, nearly all of which we hadn’t seen yet since we turned towards Gokyo slightly after Namche Bazaar. We passed a valley where we could see the path to Dingboche and Chukhung. After a while we came to the little village of Pangboche that had nice views of Ama Dablam, Lhotse, and Nuptse.

Later we saw the turn off to head right for Phortse, but we continued left all the way down to the river, crossing it before another steep uphill. The river was beautiful and flowing vigorously. Finally we were in Tengboche, a lovely little town where we had an absolutely fantastic lunch at Tashi Delek. I had to wait almost an hour for a pizza since they turned on the special pizza oven for me, but it was definitely worth the wait and probably the best meal I had in the Himalayas. Also, they had a western toilet (with a flush!!!), which was impossibly exciting after days of deprivation. By now it was much warmer (and greener! We’d made it back down past the tree-line) and we shed layers (I removed the second and third pant layers for the first time in over a week) and ate outside with a spectacular view of Everest, Ama Dablam, Lhotse and Nuptse, as well as the beautiful monastery here. To say we were pleased would be an understatement.

After lunch we briefly explored the monastery before continuing down (and up and down and up and down).

We passed a field of yaks being loaded up for hauling expedition gear to the top. And we also saw loads of sherpas carrying NBC Discovery gear for coverage of the BASE jumper (good luck to him, that sounds like a terrible decision…). [NB: The jump was canceled due to the avalanche.]

It was only about six hours of actual walking, but this day felt much harder than many of the others (even despite the fact that the oxygen levels felt indulgent to us at this point). I always find the downhill a bit of a struggle, between the impact on the knees and the inevitable blisters (by the end of the day I had band-aids on seven of ten toes), and the whole already being “done” mentally thing. Over the past two days we descended 7,000 feet, not to mention the ups and downs, which would make it probably closer to a figure around 9,000. That’s a lot of hills. (Also, the second day of descent was very dusty.)

We stayed at the same tea house in Namche Bazaar (in the very same room!) as we did on the way up. This time again we showered, and it was either much warmer or the higher altitudes gave us thicker skin because it was the most glorious shower of all times and I didn’t even complain about waiting for my hair to dry in the cold.

We had a celebratory dinner of meat! And apple pie! Eventually Jenni moseyed on up to bed, and while Alan was hanging out in the common room, Rishi wandered up to Alan and began a conversation with, “so, if you were serious about the helicopter thing…”

It was hard to believe. Very hard to believe. But Rishi informed us that another Himalayan Glacier client had hired a helicopter for the next morning because she was ill. Her guide was unable to go down with her since he was still taking the rest of his group up to Island Peak. Since she had the extra room in her chopper, and Rishi would be able to make sure she arrived safely at the clinic down in Kathmandu, we basically got to freeload rides in her rescue chopper. We were skeptical up until the last minute. Even walking up to the heli-pad. Even sitting there waiting with a sick woman who’d painfully made her way up there. But then there it was.

Sweet, glorious, helicopter in the Himalayas. Was that not one of the coolest things I’ve ever done! Alan had already been in a chopper, but this was Jenni’s first time. It took a lot of self restraint not to gush about how excited I was (out of respect for the poor girl sitting next to me), but knowing she was there also helped me to not freak out about the whole heights thing. I knew I couldn’t make it about me, when this lady was sitting in her generously shared rescue ‘copter fighting for air.

After a refueling stop in Lukla, we arrived in the Kathmandu airport and (no joke) took the ambulance with this poor sick woman all the way to the clinic (talk about overstaying your welcome and feeling a little awko taco). We grabbed a car back to Hotel Shanker and that night we celebrated our farewell dinner with the EBC trekkers from the other Himalayan Glacier group. Somehow, even with the loss of a day on the front-end, we finished our trek early! So our 14 day trek ended up being a jam-packed and adventure filled 12 day trek, but we wouldn’t change a thing. (Well, except maybe the headaches and nausea).

Practical Info

Accommodation: In Pheriche we stayed at Pumori Lodge. There are several accommodation options in this village, and others we saw offered WiFi. But the welcome was warm at our tea house, both literally (as noted, the stove was fired much of the time) and figuratively. In Namche, we stayed again at the Nest (in room 211), which we already covered in our previous post.

Food and Drinks: We had lunch in Thukla the first day of our descent…meh. The food at Pumori Lodge in Pheriche was fairly good. Lunch at Tashi Delek in Tengboche was great, both the food and the view from the large deck. It was glorious to enjoy milk in my coffee and soft butter at breakfast back in Namche Bazaar after a week plus of avoiding meat and dairy.

Activities: It was nice to see the monastery in Tengboche. There is no entrance fee but a small donation is recommended.

April 14-16, 2014 (Monday-Wednesday)

The Highest We Ever Got

An hour or two after leaving Dzongla for Lobuche, we rejoined the main Everest Base Camp (“EBC”) trail and it felt like coming back to civilization, seeing so many more people. We even bumped into the other half of the Himalayan Glacier trekkers, on their way down after summiting Kala Patthar. We bonded in our Lobuche tea house over altitude sickness, cold, and general lack of creature comforts. They continued on to more oxygen-rich environments and we spent the afternoon playing many rounds of dhumbal and chatting with our new friends Mike and Sandra from the Bay Area. It was here that we began seeing lots of Everest climbers, and I have to admit, this environment is really inspiring. Andrew recognized an IMG guide from a documentary he’d seen as the guy who helped break up the infamous 2013 EBC brawl between sherpas and foreign climbers.

The next morning we trekked to Gorak Shep (our “final” destination) where we ate lunch at our tea house before setting out for EBC.

This was perhaps one of my favorite moments of the whole trek. This big group of yaks came through, and they were all wearing bells and decorated with yak earrings and colorful sweaters. It just felt magical. Like a herd of Christmas yaks were coming back from the North Pole. Sigh. I love yaks. Andrew smartly pointed out that I’m probably a bigger fan of the animals than I am of the mountains. I can’t deny it.

Eventually we began seeing EBC and the Khumbu Glacier and Khumbu Icefall. (Just a few days after we left there was an avalanche there resulting in the deadliest day ever on the mountain. Terribly sad and even more personally impactful knowing we likely passed some of the stricken sherpas on our walk. Our hearts go out to them and their families.)

The walk to EBC took less than two hours, and while it was a bit of up and down, we didn’t find it too challenging (fortunately we all avoided some rock falls). I think by this point we were much better acclimatized and everything felt easier, even though we were above 17,000 feet. We enjoyed huge views of Nuptse on our right, Lingtren (conjuring extreme skiing images for Alan) and Pumo Ri. By the way, this area is very close to Tibet. We asked Rishi about a mountain we saw barely beyond the others, and he said “oh, that’s not ours.”

A lot of people say EBC is not terribly exciting; “it’s just tents.” But they are the tents of people gearing up to climb the tallest mountain in the world! Unless you know climbers or guides in the actual EBC tents, you will only view base camp from a short distance rather than really getting in the midst of it. So while we didn’t cover the entire area, based on what we saw we’d say the rumors of lots of trash are false. In fact, we saw several porters carrying down jugs of human waste and bags full of garbage, and thought this area was relatively free of litter (sadly, this was not the case for other parts of the trail, especially a small area near the village of Gokyo). We found it very exciting to be at EBC. Or perhaps it’s just that it was the first “big” destination we hit where I didn’t feel like dying from the altitude. Either way, it was a special moment.

We even got to witness Tibetan monks singing and dancing in prayer for a safe journey for the climbers.

After getting a few pictures in, the weather turned drastically, and I could barely get enough layers on to keep from getting snowy and cold. True story, Alan had to pull up my rain pants. We did manage to get in this picture for Alan’s mom, whose birthday it happened to be when we made it EBC!

For the final big push of the trek we woke early to summit Kala Patthar. I was on the fence about even attempting it given how I’d fared on Cho La Pass, but having felt so strong at EBC I gave it a go. We all felt surprisingly good going up. We lucked out with great weather again, and a slow steady climb with multiple stops for water (since the Camel-Bak kept freezing), brought us to the summit around 7:15. The last stretch is a bit of a beast because you traverse some large rocks that were covered with a fresh coating of snow. At times I could swear the summit was getting farther away. It’s a little bit shorter distance than the hike up Gokyo Ri, which also helped it feel easier for us. But the altitude was our highest of the trip at 18,200 feet!

We watched the the sun rising behind Everest, and from the summit we savored phenomenal views of the other big ones like Lhotse, Nupste, Lingtren and Pumo Ri towering directly above us.

Back at the tea house we secured our place in history by decorating a shirt and hanging it on the ceiling. It’s possible this brought me more pleasure than actually climbing those peaks ;). Go team Cali! We wound up using the t-shirt Himalayan Glacier gave us, but those coming from home who wish to do something like this might consider bringing a flag and/or photographs to affix. (P.S. I was impressed how well represented Turkey was in these tea houses! I think we saw at least one Turkish flag on every wall!)

Practical Info

We began our Kala Patthar hike at 5:30 am and summited at 7:15 am. Some start at 4 am to really see the sunrise from the top. I would consider starting more like 7 am. You want an early start to ensure the weather doesn’t turn bad, but if you start later than we did then I think you would enjoy better lighting for pictures. While we were at the top, Everest was so back-lit that it was hard to get good photos.

Accommodation: We stayed at Lobuche Eco Resort. It costs 350/hour to charge batteries and WiFi was an exorbitant 1000/hour. The common area was loaded with real mountaineers and we enjoyed the energy and excitement in the (thin) air. In Gorak Shep we stayed at Yeti Resort. We do not know if the alternatives are better, but we did not particularly like this place. It smelled bad, the toilet was on an incline which was treacherous when icy, and the construction was unusually shoddy leading to a door-lock-opening injury and walls that didn’t fully connect so you could sort of see your neighbor vs. the usual simply hearing her.

April 12-14, 2014 (Saturday-Monday)

Cho La the Beast

We woke at 4:40 for an early breakfast and start for the hardest day of the trek. By the time we got out the door it was 5:50 and there was no need for a headlamp, but the sun was blocked by the large mountains ahead (we were going east) and we pressed on against the biting cold. This was the first time I busted out the large down jacket that Himalayan Glacier loaned us and it was definitely necessary. The start of the walk was technically simple, still an upward climb, still cold and still at elevation, but easy footing. And it was long. I found myself employing various tactics to distract myself, resorting not so far in to “99 bottles of beer on the wall.” This soon failed, and I went to my happy place: dogs. I pretended in my mind that I was out in the backyard of my childhood home, playing snowball fetch with Beyaz (my family dog who recently left us).

After a bit of a climb we reached the top of a hill from where we could view the actual pass. It’s a decent downhill climb, and then a steep, rocky incline, followed by an even steeper, rockier, icier incline. I asked Rishi one final time, “you think I can do this?” He confirmed, I took a deep breath and on we went.

I don’t recall exactly when I began to panic, but I know it culminated in tears and me turning to Alan to say “Alan, I’m panicking. I’m freaking out!” Rishi said something along the lines of “there’s a lot of work to be done here,” and pulled me onwards, directing me in nearly every step as I tried to avoid slipping down to a rocky, icy, deathly fall. I wound up arriving faster than the rest, thanks mostly to the jet-like propulsion of fear and the most intense desire to not be there anymore. Also because Rishi pulled me up the last few steps. In fact, by the final several meters I must have looked on the verge of fainting because every time I looked up, huffing and puffing, there were at least a handful of men holding their hands out for me to grab on and get pulled up to the next boulder. So thank you, strange men and especially Rishi.

We had a mini feast at the top of the pass (5370m!), Rishi jovially handing out hard boiled eggs, Snickers bars, biscuits and fistfuls of toasted corn with soya beans that another porter had.

While Jenni would be hard-pressed to recall it, the views from the top of the pass were actually quite beautiful. We could see Nuptse, Cholatse, Taboche, Ama Dablam…

Crossing the snowfield to descend is by comparison a million times easier than the ascent, but it is quite a slippery path. I know it looks like I’m doing the robot in this picture, but I’m actually just trying not to slide down into the center of this giant ice field.

I wish I had known that our “down” side of the pass was by comparison super easy. I think a large part of my panic attack was the realization that “holy crap, even if I make it up this damn thing, there’s no way I’ll make it back down.” But thank my lucky stars, crossing from west to east as we did is a far more difficult uphill.

The whole day took us less than 6.5 hours, compared to the guides’ warning of 8-9. And this includes several stops on the walk down for me to puke behind rocks. Alan, the ever dutiful blog photographer on this trek, did not fail to capture evidence of my ailment…

Arriving in Dzongla, I was barely in a condition to communicate. I flopped down in the common room and proceeded to pass out while the rest of the team enjoyed lunch. Thankfully that ended up being the worst of my altitude sickness and it was much smoother sailing from here on out.

Alan adds: I think part of why crossing Cho La Pass was the hardest day is that the terrain made it nearly impossible to relax and take your time. With most of the trails and days, we are able to move at an awkwardly slow pace when ascending and thus help avoid headaches and greater shortness of breath. But much of the ascent to cross the pass was so steep and rocky/icy/snowy that we really had to scramble and expend bursts of energy.

Also, I admire Jenni for pushing herself and overcoming fear and sickness. It can be difficult to know when one’s altitude symptoms require descent vs. just tolerating pain and discomfort. Perhaps even harder only a month after being hospitalized following uncertainty about her ailments at the time. Jenni fought through like a champ and this allowed us to finish the trek with great success.

On the walk out from Dzongla, to Lobuche (where we joined back up with the main EBC trail), we peeped some climbers on their way to summiting Lobuche East. Incredible. Check out the zoomed in shot, and then for some perspective on the feat they accomplished, look at the next zoomed out shot of the mountain they are on.

We, on the other hand, were very thankful to have a much easier day post-Cho La. A quick couple hours leisurely walk brought us back to the EBC trail (and way more people!).

Practical Info

We did our loop hike by first going up the Gokyo Valley and then crossing the Cho La Pass from west to east. Some do it in the opposite direction. As noted above, we were happy to ascend the steeper and more challenging side of the pass and descend the comparatively easier side. The views on the descent were awesome, too, with Ama Dablam directly ahead of us.

You could leave from Gokyo and cross the pass in the same day, but it would be pretty hard. Crossing the glacier from Gokyo to Thangnag is not so easy, and you want to cross the pass early in the day to increase the likelihood of favorable conditions. However, if you are looking to save time, you could definitely make it all the way to Lobuche on the same day as crossing the pass. We were not in a rush and with Jenni’s altitude sickness we were happy to settle in Dzongla, but you could hike another 2-3 hours and get to Lobuche well before dark.

Accommodation: In Dzongla we stayed at the Hotel Zongla Inn. The location was breathtaking, with Cholatse towering above us.

April 11, 2014 (Friday)